I first heard about the court case brought by Ika and Werner van Wyk—the landmark challenge to South Africa’s parental leave laws—from an ecstatic colleague who believed it was a huge step forward. I, admittedly, had a feeling of discomfort. I still have that feeling. Let me explain.

The ruling allows couples to decide how they will share the four months of parental leave between them—it does not give men their own four months of parental leave.

In reading coverage of the decision, and in statements by the couple explaining why they took the case to the Constitutional Court, I understood their perspective. Ika wanted to return to work sooner, while Werner would be the primary caregiver of their child for the parental leave period. For them, and other couples in equitable relationships—where both parents have agency to decide how caregiving is shared—this judgment is liberating.

Most are not in equitable partnerships, nor with partners who view caregiving as a shared responsibility. While the judgment now gives non-birthing parents the opportunity to share parental leave between them, we must confront the structural inequities in most households—where caregiving burdens fall almost entirely on women.

My fear is this: for women in abusive relationships, or those whose unpaid care work is already taken for granted, this new ruling could become a tool wielded by the male parent—exploited in ways that harm rather than help the mother and the child. This fear draws from the lived experience of many low-income women who already struggle under heavy caregiving demands.

To illustrate: The MotherLoad Project, led by researchers from UCT together with mothers appointed as co-researchers, seeks to reshape how care is understood and to inform more responsive care policies. Some reflections from the project include:

• “Fathers don’t want to participate in the unpaid work that women do in raising children. The men stand on the road to make quick money … Men and women are groomed differently.”
• “If the washing is not done, the blame will go to the mother.”
• “An empty wallet creates an empty space. This picture represents a mother who receives no support from the father and feels empty.”
• Referring to an alcohol advert “Escaping from the responsibility and reality of the household and helping the mother”
• Referring to a tree with ripe fruit: “This plant represents the early grooming of young girls to be mothers at such a young age.”

These are not fringe stories—they reflect the daily reality of countless mothers in South Africa. The situation of Ika and Werner is the minority. Applying this ruling across all families, without attention to context, is risky.

Mothers are afforded four months of maternity leave for a reason—because of the physical, emotional and mental burden of pregnancy, birthing, and caring for a young child during the first few months of their life. Even when they return to work, that burden remains in their bodies and hearts. Sharing maternity leave with a partner is not a transactional act – it is a deep complex process and the right amount of care is needed to navigate it well.

From a personal perspective, I would have wanted my husband to spend more time with us when my daughter was born—but my time at home with her was not something I was prepared to sacrifice.

What I would have liked to see, alongside the ConCourt ruling, is a deliberate strategy for shifting societal norms so that more families can function in genuinely equitable ways—where male partners actively share the mental and physical load of child-rearing. The additional failure in the ruling lies in not allocating men their own parental leave entitlement, independent of the maternity benefits afforded to women.

As part of the parenting sector, we must treat this as an urgent call to action. Over the coming years, we should help families work toward gender equity at home—so that when the new law takes effect, mothers are truly empowered to retain their right to extended leave if that’s what’s best for them and their babies. They should never be pressured, coerced, or made to feel they must give up that right prematurely.

Yes, men have much to gain from a more balanced parental leave regime. But we must guard against relationships where a man can claim leave without the mother’s consent. That is both a risk and an opportunity—and one we must name, confront, and prepare for.